I haven't much to say these days, only that life is becoming more monotone. Hooray. A couple friendships have been growing a bit more as the month of December passed by, such as things with Cameron. I'm really glad that that has been okay. The only thing that hasn't been okay has been the way view this new relationship. I guess its not really new to me, seeing as I have been friends with him, steadily, for almost a year now, but now we actually hang out and talk on the phone if we are both ungodly bored. I guess that means people can start being pissed at me for something again. At least I think that's how most of my family sees it. I get told "be wise" about 5 times a week, and my sister rolls her eyes when she sees my phone going off and its a text from Cameron. I know the past is something to be afraid of, but in his defense, and mine as well, we are both totally different people now. Maybe not a full 180 different, but different enough to where we can come to terms about things, and leaves things in the past that should just be left there. I haven't had to worry about awkward moments between us too much. It just feels...normal? I don't want to say that and make it sound like I am falling in love with him again and we are back doing what we used to, but that's the only word I can use to explain it. We are just friends, and I am grateful for that. The only awkward moment was when his little brother, Ian, didn't remember me, and everyone had to explain that he knew me before, and some random memories were brought up. Other than that, his family has been accepting, and it feels like old times again. We all sit around watching movies, eating grilled cheese, and playing 360, Playstation, and computer games. When we get alone time from his brothers, we go out for a smoke (he is doing all the smoking), we talk about how much things have changed for the both of us, and how different we are. It almost feels like the rolls have been switched, but I hope I don't become the heartbreaker with a knack for messing with guys' heads. I think people just want me to be his enemy, and for him to be my enemy, but with only a few close friends sticking around Flint, I can't waste them on enemies. I mean, who would rather have more enemies than friends?
Other than Cam, I have made a couple new friends, and gotten closer with a couple more SP people, so that is great too. Other than that, these last four days have been getting my head around the future and where that is headed. One thing I am doing is working out until my ass falls off. I really need to get in shape, and start eating better. I mean, getting in shape is a bonus when trying to get rid of all this shitty food I eat. All I ever do is snack, and I am trying to cut that out. Hopefully this motivation lasts me past my first week of school otherwise I am going to die.
Speaking of school, I should probably order my books, and maybe open my German book again and remember some of the things that I learned. Sheesh.
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