I Believe In a Thing Called Love

I'm still confused about how I feel. It's annoying...

I talked to him quite a bit this weekend.

On Saturday, he texted me after the dance, and we got into some serious conversations. There are some things we both definitely miss, and some things that most definitely would have to change. Then we talked for like five seconds yesterday, but I did get the chance to ask him one simple question:

Do you really want to be with me, or do you just like the idea of me?

Here is exactly what he said:"I did love you and want you, but I am not completely sure what I want at the moment. Just give it time. The most important thing at the moment is to make sure both of us know exactly how each of us feel."

I would have to agree with this. I'm so confused right now it's ridiculous! I still have feelings for him of course, but I think I need to take this question into consideration too. I do really like the idea of being with him, but is it worth it all?

Most people would have to say its not, but I can't go on listening to what people want me to do and do as everyone tells me, that's never going to get me anywhere. Plus I'll be doing what THEY want me to do, not what I want to do. It's a confusing process of searching myself and getting to know my heart a little better, but I find that this has woken me up a bit.

I think I would still be living in the shadows of my mind had I not had this opportunity to visit my heart which hasn't been visited in a while. I've come to a conclusion that some of the things that happened between he and I was because I was ignoring what my heart told me, and just going with my mind and agreeing to what my friends told me; I assumed that they knew best. Now, I'm not sure at this point who was right and wrong, but that's all in the past, and now I have to learn from my decisions, and where they have taken me at this point in time.